One Simple Question, Millions of Answers
by Smicc
Summary: Momo comes to club one day and jumps to conclusions. GP, TezFuji, TezOishi


Disclaimer: I don't own Prince of Tennis, which is sad. But I'd love them all as a harem for my birthday!

One Simple Question, Millions of Answers

It was not a normal practice. Not in the least, was the first thing Momo decided upon getting to the courts. Sure there were the underclassmen picking up the loose tennis balls. Their sempais practicing on the courts not in use by the regulars; Taka and Inui were playing on one court and Echizen and Kaidoh were finishing up on the one next to it, but the biggest problem was the fact that everyone appeared to be chatting non-stop and no one was getting in trouble for it. Momo cocked his head to the side as he took in the sight.

"Echizen? What happened?"

"What do you mean Momo-sempai," asked Echizen looking confused by the question. Trust Echizen to be completely oblivious to all that was happening around him. Momo sighed and gave up the question, there was no way he could explain to Echizen that something was wrong with the club.

"… Where's buchou?" Echizen pointed over his shoulder to a corner of the courts, and Momo finally beheld the strangest sight of all. Tezuka was crouched in a corner, knees drawn to his chest, eyes wide. Fuji was standing a few feet away smiling.

"What's wrong with buchou?" Asked Momo inadvertently taking a step away incase whatever Tezuka had was contagious. Echizen shrugged his shoulders.

"That's not an answer!" yelled Momo as Echizen began walking over to Taka.

"mada mada da ne" he called over his shoulder.

"Momo" came a voice from behind Momo startling him into the air.

"In-Inui-sempai! Don't scare me like that." Inui didn't respond.

"I overheard your question."

"Oh! Do you know what's wrong with Tezuka-buchou."

"He came out of the clubhouse at exactly 3:05 and retired to his corner. He did not say anything. Fuji appears to know what caused Tezuka-buchou's condition. However, he seems too greatly amused to do anything about it." Inui read out of his little green notebook. So Inui-sempai didn't know either.

"… What about Oishi-sempai?" surely he would have commented on everyone's lack of focus, he probably would know what was wrong with Tezuka as well. It was just one of those buchou-fuku-buchou things.

"He has been running laps since 3:01. He's on lap 64,"

"64! How many laps did he get!"

"He began running immediately after exiting the clubhouse. He didn't mention anything about getting laps. He did appear quite red though."

"What did he do to get laps? Oishi-sempai never gets laps," asked Momo.

"He didn't say." There was something wrong with those statements. Just like there was something wrong with Tezuka-buchou. Who else, other than Fuji-sempai, would possibly know what happened to Oishi-sempai and Tezuka-buchou? Of course!

"What about Eiji-sempai? Where's he?"

"Kikumaru is running laps as well,"

"Him too! How many?"

"Both Kikumaru and Oishi have been running since 3:01 and are now on lap 68."

"Why's Eiji-sempai running?" It was not as rare as seeing Oishi-sempai run, but still very rarely did Tezuka-buchou hand out that extreme a number of laps.

"Presumably for the same reason as Oishi. He also declined to give a reason… well actually, He was going to say something but Oishi stopped him, he said something about a lesson. Poor grades perhaps?" offered Inui, he then walked off to start up a game with Kaidoh. Looked like if Momo wanted to find out some real answers he was going to have to ask Fuji-sempai. It's just that Fuji-sempai was so… tricky and he wouldn't necessarily give Momo the correct answer. It was always scary approaching Fuji-sempai. But Momo took a deep breath and walked over to Fuji.

"Fuji-sempai."

"Ah. Momo. How are you today?"

"Fine… What's wrong with Tezuka-buchou?"

"Saa… nothing… just a case of too much information."

"Too much information?" Fuji nodded. That sounded more like a problem Inui-sempai would have.

"Is he learning data tennis too?" asked Momo confused. Fuji raised his eyebrow.

"It's a figure of speech-"

"NO! It's really too much information!" cried Tezuka jumping up. Momo took a step back. Fuji smiled.

"I thought it was rather interesting-"

"OISHI! KIKUMARU! 50 MORE LAPS!" yelled Tezuka.

"Eh!" came Eiji's startled cry from across the courts. "Tezuka-buchou's mean! We didn't even do anything this time! It was Fuj-"

"Shh! Eiji. We don't want more laps," came Oishi's voice.

"It was just a simple question!"

"Saa… Tezuka, don't you think you're being a little harsh? They haven't even finished the fir-"

"Do you want to join them," snapped Tezuka, seemingly reclaiming his sanity. Fuji smirked.

"Join them? Well I don't think Oishi would quite appreciate it, but you never know about Eiji. However, I get the feeling that he'd rather keep Oishi to himself." Tezuka's eyes went wide and his face paled. Fuji smirked wider. Tezuka mumbled something and then returned to his corner.

"Fuji-sempai. I think you broke buchou." Said Momo.

"Not me. Oishi."

"Oishi-sempai? How'd Oishi-sempai break buchou?"

"You'll have to ask him that yourself," said Fuji. Momo scratched his head as he watched Fuji walk off. All his sempais were acting suspiciously today.

About a half and hour later the golden pair finally stopped their running and collapsed onto one of the benches just inside of the entrance to the courts. They were both breathing hard and had done a record number of 150 laps. Fuji had immediately gone over to them and handed them a pair of water bottles that they had gratefully accepted. He then had whispered something. Eiji smiled brightly and nodded. Oishi got even redder dropped his head into his hands and began mumbling. In fact it looked very similar to what Tezuka had been doing, just without the loss of sanity. Well no time like the present to take Fuji-sempai's advice. Momo squared his shoulder and walked over to the trio.

"Oishi-sempai?" he asked. Oishi looked up at him.

"Ah Momo. What did you need?" he asked politely.

"Uh. Well, actually….Why'd you break Tezuka-buchou?" asked Momo, pointing to Tezuka in the corner. Eiji began laughing. Oishi turned bright red. The rest of the regulars just as eager to find out what was really going on made their way over, pretending not listen.

"I…er… well… I didn't…" Oishi fumbled, doing a wonderful impression of a fish.

"Nya! Wasn't Oishi!" smiled Eiji. Momo looked over at the red head.

"Then who broke buchou?"

"A question!" said Eiji energetically. "It's a really simple one too! I just asked Tezuka how he-" Oishi's eyes widened and quickly clapped a hand over Eiji's mouth. If it was possible Oishi turned even redder. Fuji smiled. Inui began jotting down data.

"What could be so bad about a question?" asked Taka forgetting that he was supposed to be pretending that he wasn't eavesdropping.

"Yes, what could possibly be so bad about a question Oishi?" smiled Fuji. Oishi paled as he looked at Fuji. Eiji pried away Oishi's hand.

"It's not a bad question, Tezuka-buchou just has issues," answered Eiji.

"Eiji," whispered Oishi warning his partner that Tezuka was just over there and could probably hear every word of their conversation… if he hadn't been rocking back and forth, covering both ears and mumbling.

"Well I had to ask someone-"

"Not Tezuka. I told you he wouldn't react so wel-"

"But you said I couldn't ask Fuji because he was-"

"STOP!" interrupted Oishi turning red again. That seemed to pull him out of his conversation. He looked around to see that everyone was just standing around watching them.

"What are you all waiting for? Get back to practice!" he commanded. The non-regulars all jumped back into action. The regulars looked at Oishi dumbly. Taka was the one who brought attention to the issue.

"Well since you broke Buchou… he hasn't assigned any drills for today," said Taka as politely as he could, given the statement and the circumstances. Fuji and Eiji chuckled. Oishi sighed.

"Anything. Just do anything."

"Anything?" asked Fuji. Oishi turned to shoot the shorter boy a glare.

"Within in reason, and relating to tennis," amended Oishi before shooing them all onto the courts.

"That really didn't answer my question. Not at all," said Momo as he and Echizen went onto one court.

"What are you mumbling about now Momo-sempai," complained Echizen.

"I didn't get an answer about what happened to buchou"

"Kikumaru-sempai said it was a question."

"Yeah, but how on earth could a question do that?"

"hmm. I wonder," smiled Fuji walking past Momo with Taka at his side. "What question could break Tezuka and make Oishi turn red… I could think of a few." Echizen made a face.

"I really don't want to know… Fuji-sempai's perverted." Said Echizen.

"Wait! You don't think…"

"I don't think what Momo-sempai?"

"Tezuka-buchou… and Oishi-sempai…"

"What?"

"You don't think they're…" Momo paused looking around furtively. Tezuka was still broken. Oishi appeared to be attempting to fix him. Inui, Kaidoh and Eiji were doing an accuracy drill a couple of courts over, and Taka and Fuji were playing on the court next to them. Then he leaned across the net, and whispered. "You don't think they're a couple!" Echizen's eyes got wide and he jumped back a few steps.

"Buchou and Oishi-sempai!"

"Well what else could he have asked?"

"… But what about Kikumaru-sempai?"

"… He must have been the one that asked if Tezuka-buchou if he would have been responsive." Said Momo nodding his head in a final manner.

"What do you mean?"

"Like girls, they never come out and ask you directly if you like them. They always send one of their friends to ask one of your friends if you'd like them."

"Kikumaru-sempai said he was going to ask Fuji-sempai,"

"Oishi-sempai must have decided that it was better just to have Kikumaru-sempai ask Tezuka directly instead of going through Fuji-sempai. Fuji-sempai would have probably twisted the whole thing up. It was best just to have Kikumaru-sempai ask Tezuka-buchou if he wanted to go on a date with Oishi-sempai,"

"Date?"

"Date."

"Date?" interrupted Inui coming up next to Echizen; he seemed to be implementing drills for all the regulars. Echizen and Momo jumped.

"Inui-sempai! That's twice today."

"Who's got a date?" asked Inui again, completely ignoring Momo's statement.

"Tezuka-buchou and Oishi-sempai." Answered Momo. Inui's glasses flashed and he looked over to the corner which Oishi, and a relatively more sane Tezuka were talking.

"Iii data..." He said and scribbled something into his notebook.

"It makes sense though doesn't it? They're always staying late after club practice and they're always talking to each other."

"Oishi-sempai is always talking to everyone," said Echizen. Momo frowned.

"He smiles the most when he's talking to buchou." Said Momo.

"You've been spying on Oishi-sempai?"

"No!"

"You're incorrect Momo. Oishi smiles the most when talking to Kikumaru." Announced Inui.

"Well… that's just an Eiji-sempai thing. Everyone smiles when talking to Eiji-sempai." Said Momo waving his hand as if to dismiss the argument. Inui nodded his head acceding the point before walking over to Taka and Fuji's court.

"What about Kikumaru-sempai though?" asked Echizen after a few minutes.

"I already told you! He's the girl!"

"No. Not that. I mean. What happens to Kikumaru-sempai? I thought he liked Oishi-sempai."

"Oh that's right… Poor Eiji-sempai. That was pretty cruel for Oishi-sempai to make Eiji-sempai ask Tezuka-buchou for him."

"And what about Fuji-sempai? I thought he liked Buchou?" asked Echizen. Momo nodded.

"We'll have to take them out to dinner! This time it'll be our treat."

"Your treat Momo-sempai. I'm not that sincere." Announced Echizen, his moment of feeling sorry for them passing as quickly as it had come.

A few minutes later Oishi realized that even though he told everyone to practice, no one actually was. They were all still talking and goofing off. He sighed and called them to attention.

"This has been a disappointing practice. I expect to see twice the effort in tomorrow's practice. But there's no point in keeping you here if nothing is going to get accomplished. Club dismissed!" said Oishi. There was an assortment of yays and joy filled yells as the club members went rushing into the clubhouse happy to get out early for once. Oishi gently pulled Tezuka to his feet and helped the other boy over to the clubhouse.

"Eiji-sempai! Fuji-sempai!" called Momo waving both of the sempais over to him and Echizen. Eiji bounced over and Fuji followed him. "Want to get burgers tonight?" asked Momo. Eiji eyed him warily. Momo held up his hands as a sign of surrender. "My treat?" Eiji smiled and swung an arm around Momo's shoulders.

"Well in that case! Lets get some burgers!" The four quickly changed and then left for the burger restaurant.

They were sitting in one of the booths near the windows. Momo had is extraordinary amount of burgers, and Echizen had a matching pile. Fuji raised an eyebrow at the amount of food the two underclassmen had.

"Are you going to be able to eat all?" asked Fuji. They nodded.

"They're human garbage disposals! My poor wallet has proven that," sighed Eiji.

"Ah. Cheer up Eiji-sempai!" smiled Momo suddenly remembering that their mission had been to distract Fuji and Eiji from their relationship problems. "This is a special occasion!"

"It is?" asked Fuji.

"Why?" asked Eiji.

"Uh…" stammered Momo. Echizen kicked his leg under the table.

"Idiot Momo-sempai!" he hissed.

"What's really going on?" asked Fuji. Eiji nodded. Something had been funny since they'd accepted the invitation.

"Nothing! Nothing at all!" said Momo with a nervous laugh. Echizen just glared at Momo. His sempai was blowing it.

"Just eat and forget about all your troubles!"

"All our troubles nya?" asked Eiji.

"Yeah!"

"What troubles?" asked Fuji fixing Momo with a suspicious look. Momo chuckled nervously. Had he mentioned how much he hating confronting Fuji-sempai for these exact reasons.

"Momo is crazy! Wait until Oish-"

"I'M SORRY!" cried Momo suddenly jumping up. The other three at the table looked up at him confused. Momo blushed and sat back down. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry you had to be the girl Eiji-sempai!" Eiji looked confused.

"What do you mean? We haven't… " he trailed off turning bright red. "How did you even know about that!" he asked suddenly.

"It was cruel of Oishi-sempai. He should have considered your feelings too." Said Momo. It felt good to finally say that. Momo wasn't good with secrets, or keeping them.

"Cruel?… Oishi?" asked Eiji genuinely confused.

"And Fuji-sempai! I'm sorry, it must be hard for you too!" said Momo. Fuji looked just as confused as Eiji.

"What on earth are you talking about Momo?" asked Fuji. Momo looked at his two sempais. Had they blocked out the memories that fast? It was astonishing.

"Oishi-sempai and Tezuka-buchou's date of course." Eiji and Fuji both blinked.

"Date?" asked Eiji.

"Oishi and Tezuka?" asked Fuji. The two third years turned to look at each other. They looked serious for a moment, before bursting out in laughter.

"That was a good one Momo! Oishi and Buchou!" laughed Eiji.

"It'd never happen," laughed Fuji.

"But… it is… "

"Where did you get that idea?" asked Eiji.

"You asked Buchou if he likes Oishi-sempai," answered Momo. Eiji looked confused.

"When did I do that?"

"…Wasn't that the question you asked Buchou before practice?" it was Momo's turn to be confused. Eiji shook his head.

"Nya! I didn't ask that."

"Then…" His questions weren't being answered, and he was back at square one. "Just what did Oishi-sempai ask buchou that broke buchou?" asked Momo his sempais were sneaky and frustrating. Making him believe that Oishi-sempai and Buchou were going on a date.

"It wasn't Oishi… _I_ broke buchou." Said Eiji reluctantly. Fuji grinned.

"No. Eiji, you didn't break Tezuka. Your question surprised him and he didn't know how to react… I don't think he wanted to know about your relationship." Fuji said.

"So it isn't Oishi-sempai and Buchou? … Eiji-sempai got a girlfriend?" asked Echizen. Fuji laughed. Momo dropped his head to the table.

"So what's going on! Buchou and Oishi-sempai aren't going on a date, but Eiji-sempai dating some girl, why would that break buchou?"

"Nya. Not a girlfriend." Said Eiji.

"Well then what's goi-"

"Boyfriend."

"Okay but why…" then Eiji's statement caught up with Momo's brain. Boyfriend! Eiji-sempai had a boyfriend! "How on earth would Eiji-sempai having a boyfriend break buchou?" His poor brain was just getting chased around in circles. Then a thought struck him. "Is buchou homophobic?" Fuji laughed.

"No. Quite the opposite actually," and Momo could have sworn Fuji-sempai was smirking.

"So then why would Eiji-sempai having a boyfriend break buchou?" asked Momo.

"Eiji was just quite vivid in describing the scenario his question pertained to," smiled Fuji.

"Well how else was I going to get the point across?"

"I think you broke poor Oishi too." Smiled Fuji.

"Nah, He already knew I was gonna ask." Oh yeah! Oishi-sempai. What did Oishi-sempai think about Eiji-sempai having a boyfriend?

"What did Oishi-sempai say?" asked Echizen voicing Momo's exact thoughts.

"Nya?" asked Eiji looking confused.

"What did Oishi-sempai say when you told him you had a boyfriend?" Fuji grinned. Eiji smiled. That wasn't quite the answer they were hoping for.

"…You did tell him right?"

"Of course!" said Eiji.

"And…"

"…He was happy?" said Eiji looking confused

"That's good," said Momo. It probably would have destroyed Eiji if Oishi didn't approve of his boyfriend.

"Who is it? Is it someone we know?" asked Echizen.

"Hoi!… I thought you guys already knew,"

"You two _were_ quite obvious," Fuji informed Eiji.

"Who is it?" asked Momo.

"Oishi of course."

"Oishi-sempai?" Eiji nodded. Momo looked at the grinning Fuji and Eiji. They had to be trying to screw up his head as much as possible. It had gone from buchou being broken by a question, to buchou and Oishi-sempai going on a date, to Eiji-sempai having a girlfriend to Eiji-sempai and Oishi-sempai being a couple… his poor head was never gonna recover.

Momo gave a sigh and dropped his head on the table. He wasn't opposed to them being together, far from it actually. He thought they looked good together, not that he would ever admit that out loud. Wonder who's the seme. No bad Momo. You don't want to know about the mother of Seigaku having a sex life… man did that sound weird. Mother of Seigaku and sex life.

"Eiji. That's two in one day. You've got a record going. You broke Tezuka and Momo," announced Fuji.

"I'm just talented" smiled Eiji.

"I'm sure Oishi agrees" said Fuji with a smirk. Eiji smirked right back at him. After a few minutes of silence Echizen spoke up.

"So… Kikumaru-sempai…. What exactly did you ask Buchou?" asked Echizen. Momo lifted his head up. That had been one of his originally questions. What was wrong with Buchou? He had broken because of a question that Eiji-sempai had asked. Now he was finally going to find out the answer.

"Oh. Well I knew Tezuka-buchou was gay, so I figured he'd be the best person to ask about how to seduce Oishi." Answered Eiji authoritatively. Momo dropped his head back down on the table. Sometimes it was just best not to know the answers to all your questions.

Omake:

"So. Buchou and Oishi…" began Eiji cocking his head to the side.

"What about it?" asked Fuji.

"Wonder who the uke would be." Echizen's eyes widened. He didn't even want to think about _that_. Fuji frowned deep in thought.

"Probably… Tezuka."

"Yeah. That's what I thought too." Said Eiji satisfied. Echizen dropped his head on the table.

"Three…" said Fuji smiling at the broken kouheis sitting across from them.


End file.
